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The Joy of Joy

I truly love my class.

This week is International Week. In keeping with the theme my year group is looking at Great Britain. On Tuesday morning as a starter activity I wrote on the board "In your notebook write 10 facts about Great Britain". Exactly 30 seconds later I was approached by a tearful member of the class "Miss L I don't know *anything* about Great Britain, I've never been there...."

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What Is Christmas But An Excuse....?

In what is likely to be my last post of 2007 I shall say only this - I had an AWESOME birthday. Which lasted about 4 days and involved me being waiting on hand and foot. My man is very nice to me indeed. Pity his birthday is November. I might have to make sure he has a special weekend in January, rather than waiting another 11 months.

On another note I now officially have the reputation for "member of staff with the shittest car" at school. My secret santa actually bought me a radio controlled Jeep and stuck a note on top to the effect that it would be likely to be more reliable than the rubbish I turn up in every day. Just because the RAC like to visit me in the school car park....

Tired Tired I Am TIRED

My car is invisible. FACT. This is the only explanation I have for being on a roundabout and having right of way and still nearly being driven into by a fucking bus.

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I Can Get You One Of Those

My Class Are WEIRD Part #8374849393747567574

One of the boys in my class has been trying to "have a word" with me since last week. Today we had the word. Oh. Dear. God.

Boy: Can I talk to you know about that thing?

Me: Yes, of course.

Boy: I would like to take you out on a date.

Me: ....That's very kind C but no thank you.

Boy: I really like you. Please can I take you out on a date? We can go to a French restaurant.

Me: Really, it's very kind but I can't. I'm dating somebody else but it's very nice of you to ask.

Boy: (disappointed)...OK

The boy in question is seven.

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I Come Around

Have I mentioned how much I fucking LOVE my class? This week one of them told me with a convincingly straight face that one of her best friends was Beatrix Potter. Not only that, she helped Potter write Peter Rabbit. This little "fact" has now been repeated about 3 times. Bizarre.

The Christmas shopping has been started but I still have rather a lot to do. And an end of term to prepare for. Hmph.

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Call The Shots

Well now, there's an interesting couple of days. Yesterday the fan thing on the car went completely and utterly kaput. Result? Inability to drive caused by mad rain misting EVERYTHING up. I had to call the RAC and sit in the car for an hour and a sodding half. The RAC man's "solution" was to hit something really, really hard with a spanner. The fan now works. But only at full blast, meaning my car goes from fucking freezing to face-melting hot in about 10 seconds. I have to drive with the bloody windows down.

And today we nearly drowned a child. Five times she went down, I think, and a couple of the other kids even asked if she was drowning. "Oh no!" declared the swimming teacher, with admirable calm, "she's alright". Didn't look alright to me but the swimming teacher hauled her out after about 30 seconds and then made her go straight back in. Traumatising stuff.

Why Politics Is So Very Very Important

This is why the Tories should NEVER be allowed power. The second sentence in particular has me reaching for the nearest axe...

"We want to introduce a simple test which means at the end of two years of primary school we know whether or not children have mastered the skills they need to read".

"Once children have got that skill, then teachers are free to inspire them, and children are free to read and explore on their own."

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Can I Go Back To The Start?

I was watching Starshaped the other day and what an incredibly depressing experience that turned out to be. I've not seen it in years after my video copy got ruined so when it popped up on Amazon for a mere £1.75 I couldn't help feeling it would have been rude not to buy it. You live and learn it seems, as Blur looked ridiculously young. And sounded it. I used to sit there, hanging off their every word, thinking about how cool they were and how what they said was at the very least incredibly fun. And now they just sound childish. Damon was always a bit of an arse but I really hadn't appreciated how much until now. Damn, damn, damn.

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I Face The Final Curtain

Is it possible to die of tired? I think I may be approaching that point....

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Inner City Pressure

This is why I teach.

Child "Miss L, I know of another war"

Me "Oh yes, and which one would that be?"

Child "The Waterloo War"

Me "Really? You mean The Napoleonic Wars and the Battle of Waterloo?"

Child "Yes, the Waterloo War. I know because when I was in year two I used to play Abba with S and K and I was always Beni"

Me "-"

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